If you ask my best friends from college and I tell them sometimes I just want to be alone they would laugh!
I am such an extrovert--I gain energy by being with and around people. I love to dance, cook for others, laugh out loud a lot, concerts, visiting family sometimes, and one thing I don't worry about is who sees me who communicates with me because I love talking lol. But sometimes, this extrovert just wants to be ALONE. I am married, I have a 4 year old, and a 6 year old, work full time, and I also work part-time. It's like during the day while I'm at work having taken my adderall I can work and work and be so productive. Very productive. While I am working this is one time that I want to be alone. I keep my office door closed 95% of the time. Why you ask? I think it has something to do with my anxiety---worrying that what I'm doing is not enough and someone will see me. Makes no sense right? Welp.... that's how I feel. Once I get off from work, I am usually energized! You know that feeling, even if its not Friday, when the work day ends I'M EXCITED AND FULL OF ENERGY. As I am driving home from work, I realize that I'm coming home to my next job. My family. Then on most drives home I start to get overwhelmed, anxious, and the energy turns into immediate exhaustion. Why? My children are young and need so much. Being a parent to me is scary, fun, a blessing, and sometimes overwhelming. So my energy goes away and now I'm dreading pulling up to my house. So, I sit in my car ALONE when I pull up. I meditate, listen to music, part of a podcast, or talk to a loved one. Just for about 10 minutes as a buffer between work and home. I struggle with negative self-talk and negative emotions. And this burns my brain and heart out more than I'd like it to. When I use meta-cognition, it helps with the negative self-talk and negative emotions. I think about my thinking---but when I do this, I need and want to be ALONE. I also meditate, read, pray to help me while I process these feelings. And you know what, sometimes I just need a damn break! from everything and all responsibilities. This helps me reset and get a head start on moving forward the next day with a positive mindset. So, sometimes I do stay-cations to find some time alone. I will book a hotel room bring a writing pad and just BE. Be quiet, be alone, read, pray, write, all these things I do with my phone on silent, with the tv off, and this stay-cation works for me every single time. So if you like to be alone sometimes, its not abnormal. It's not selfish. It's not a sign you need help. What it really is, you are normal for wanting alone time. This helps with burnout. You are not selfish, you are utilizing self-care. And last, because you want to be alone sometimes, does not mean you have mental health issues necessarily. But it is a possibility if you suffer from ADHD, Bipolar disorder, Depression, or anxiety these mental health disorders can cause you to want to be more introverted .
6 Comments
Tan
6/16/2020 21:58:30
OMG, this so me except for my youngest is 10 and my oldest is 24. I am always having to do so many things for so many people. Then still have to come home and complete my duties as a mother. It's very overwhelming and challenging all in itself. Sometimes I just want to run away and never look back. But I know that is not all an option. But I pray that one day things will get better and I will be able to really enjoy life like I feel I should. One Day!! Until then I need to increase my faith, pray more and love myself even more so I know what I truly deserve.
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Brandlyn
6/25/2020 13:16:14
Hi Tan! I understand that motherhood, working, and connecting with yourself are all hard to balance. What's amazing is that you've recognized your connection with this post. I hope and pray that your faith allows you to love yourself even more and you're able to make special time for yourself. Love and Hugs, Brandlyn
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Harmony
6/20/2020 10:49:22
That is why I stay up too late nearly every night these days!
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Brandlyn
6/25/2020 13:18:09
I definitely understand this! I do this too! And sometimes I get up early for a little alone time too.
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Tolisha
10/8/2020 10:00:32
I can relate to this post. Sometimes I feel like I'm being selfish for needing my space. I feel like I could be using that time to spend with my kids or husband. My life is busy busy & I get overwhelmed pretty easily. I have realized that I need my time alone to recharge and get my mind together. I need more time than the car ride home or when I shower. I am making self-care a priority not only for myself but for my family.
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Brandlyn
10/8/2020 11:02:19
I’m so happy this post was relatable! I totally understand your comments. Thank you so much for reading my blog!
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AuthorBrandlyn Owens is passionate about exploring and educating herself and others about mental health topics. She's a momma of 2 kiddos and she resides in Durham, NC. Archives
May 2021
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